May the words of my mouth.....

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19).

I  was redeemed, and so were you,  by the precious blood of Jesus, to represent the risen Christ to those around us. How am I doing in that regard—and what about you?  People did not run away or hide when Jesus came into a town—-they came towards Him.  He was worth listening to!  They might have disagreed or even hated, but they hung every word He said—-even when He breathed His last breath on the cross—His words were weighty, powerful—-and true.  So what about our words and our reputation for speaking not only the truth—but having words that are “weighty”.   Do people avoid me—-or do they seek me?  Am I annoying or a source of joy?

Three things to think about:

1. What we say, how we say it, the respect we show to those to whom we speak, and our integrity are fundamental to being a true disciple and messenger of the gosper.  You can’t share the good news of God’s love if people won’t listen to you!  If folks shun you, run from you, or are offended by the way you talk to them you’re not going to be a very good evangelist.

It’s a bit more complex now as we communicate because of the phones, texting, emails and zoom calls.  But it’s also easier to share the gospel—they can be great tools!  The danger, as I see it, is forgetting that regardless of if we speak, face-to-face, or via social media, we should watch what we say and how we say it.  People have feelings!!!

And this came back to haunt me, personally, yesterday.  I hate to hear preachers brag about their witty remarks to enemies of Christ, or how they end up being the heroes of their own embellished stories.  I much prefer hearing a priest or pastor humble themselves, as the apostles and prophets of old did, when they confess their weaknesses.  So let me tell you where I failed to abide by James 1:19 yesterday, and how it damaged my witness and hurt the cause of Jesus Christ:

I called a summer camp colleague that issues visas, like we do, asking for help.  I was as transparent, straightforward and honest as I could be, and I was sure that he would help me.  But instead, he treated me like I was a on-line caller and offered to assist me only if I paid him a ridiculous fee.   But, before I took time to pray, or reflect on his lack of courtesy, I sent a brief response sharing my disappointment that he would not help me with a discount.  He responded immediately  and told me that they would never  help us and that they would tell everyone they knew to never help me.  Okay, his answer was extremely unprofessional and childish, but my mistake was that again, I responded, and told him that I thought he was reacting in a very immature manner.  That’s the word I used, “immature”, and then he, his boss and his associate used the kind of words a teenage boy uses in the locker room to tell me what they really thought about me. It was dumbfounded, and although I told the truth, and I did not resort to vulgarity or profanity, it all could have been avoided if I had simply not responded to his first email. I could have let it go! It was obvious that their organization was not Christian based, and that they were quite worldly and greedy.   But I had this desire to “set him straight”, and knock that chip off his shoulder and show put him in his place   Jesus would not have done what I did.  It was unhelpful in all regards to my witness and this ministry.

I should have remembered what Solomon said: “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” – Proverbs 15:1, NIV.   Saying things that don’t need to be said—-just to prove my point and put them in their place, is not going to expand God’s Kingdom or my reputation as an ambassador for Christ.  I am called to be gentle, kind, peace-loving, forgiving and compassionate.  These folks were not kind, but I did not need to prove it or point it out!

So what to do?  Let the Spirit of God rest within me when I am tempted to allow the flesh take over and  speak!  When the flesh speaks, it’s all about my rights, my pride, my feelings and my hope for revenge.  When the Spirit is in control, it’s all about grace and mercy He’s given me, and I find yourself walking in my adversary’s steps.  It changes the way I see others.

2. The second thing to consider as if we want the world to hear us:  Don’t talk too much.  Frankly, make it your habit to put you lips together and listen more and speak less.  No one is going to complain if you do speak less and listen more! Solomon famously said this:  “Sin is unavoidable when there is much talk, but whoever seals his lips is wise.” Proverbs 10:19, NIV. Do you feel that people don’t pay attention to you, or listen to you or respect what you have something important to say?  It’s almost certainly because you talk too much, repeat yourself, or won’t let people “go” when you trap them into one of your discourses!!!   Most of us are guilty of this, and the worst offenders are probably preachers!  We somehow convince ourselves that people want to hear us drone and on about the vastness of our wisdom and the esoteric knowledge with which God has graced us!  Truth is that most of us wish the priest or pastor would get to the point and then sit down!   In my life, I can recall one preacher that was able to keep my attention for the entire sermon—-I would love to hear him speak every Sunday.

The best athletes don’t waste their breath telling you how talented they are, they prove it with on the football field or tennis court. The smartest person in the room rarely reminds you of their education, credentials, IQ.  In fact, it is their silence that is usually more inspiring than their yakking.  Are we listening more ….and talking less the more we grow as Christians?  Are you quick to listen——and slow to speak?   And when you listen, are you giving attention to the one speaking—-giving total attention.  It’s such a compliment to know that the person you’re talking to is listening!  But I am the first to admit that takes time and determination to listen, but there’s no greater way of saying “I love you” than to listen, carefully, without judgment biting at the bit  to give you opinion!  That’s what I miss, so much, as I approach the one-year anniversary of Jerry’s death. I never had a better friend  for two reasons: He listened to me——with complete attentiveness, and no matter what I confessed or shared, he held me in highest esteem

3. The third thing to consider comes from COLOSSIANS 4:6: “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” – What does this mean?  Talk to people like you want to be talked to!  Jesus could surely have put the prostitute in her place when she spoke with Him, or the corrupt tax collector, or Simon Peter right after he denied knowing Jesus……but He was compassionate,  gentle and gracious with people that did some pretty rotten things.  Does He expect less from us when we speak to people we don’t care for or that have taken advantage of us?  And the same grace He expects from us as we talk to those that differ from us in  matters small or weighty!

My focus as a follower of Jesus is not to “get my way”, or “give them what they deserve”, or even to “prove them wrong”, but to lead them to Jesus!!!!   And I will never do that if I speak to them, or email  or text them aggressively or without grace,  I need to speak and reason and even debate,….“seasoned with salt…”

My words should reflect to others the truth of Jesus Christ. What I say or type should reveal how Jesus has transformed my life. My words should in texts, emails or phone calls \introduce a  different “flavor” into the interactions—I should be building others up, trying to understand their point of view, and, when needed, wisely and carefully defend the truth of God’s love and His Son.

Spoken words reveal and reflect what is in my heart.  Jesus said that “for the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Luke 6:45).    A believer’s words are to be seasoned with salt so that we can “know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:6). Sharing God’s love includes knowing how to share it, accurately, but doing it with a humble and gracious manner—in such a tasteful way—that people listen to us! Believers are called to “always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” (1 Peter 3:15). Having an unwholesome, distasteful attitude, or to be one known to resort to vulgarity or profanity is not becoming of a disciple of Christ.

When I talk to strangers  it might not be about God, as when I called these folks this past week about our visa program, it was business. But as follower of Jesus, every conversation should be seasoned with salt. I  should always be ready to answer others’ questions about why I believe as I do, why I do or don’t do certain things, etc. My words should bring a different “flavor” to what might otherwise be an unsavory conversation. What a Christian says and how he says it ought to add value to a conversation just as salt does for food.

I am not a chef, but I am learning more and more that just the right amount of salt in brings out flavor and transforms a steak. It’s the same with words.Speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) and being gracious in every circumstance is speaking with salt, so to speak As Proverbs 16:24 says, “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Just as salt has healing properties, our words should bring healing and goodness, encouraging its hearers and pointing them to the One who is vital for life.

Jesus said, “Have salt among yourselves, and be at peace with each other” (Mark 9:50b). What we say and how we say it should always be seasoned with the salt of grace and peace. In order to give a seasoned answer, we must present what we say and how we say it in a way that reflects Christ. May we all prayerfully consider, in our hearts what He has done for us, before we engage our mouths!  May are reflect what the psalmist says in Psalm 19:14: “May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.”