The Elder Brother....

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“Now his older son was in the field, and as he came and drew near to the house, he heard music and dancing. And he called one of the servants and asked what these things meant. And he said to him, ‘Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fattened calf, because he has received him back safe and sound.’ But he was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him, but he answered his father, ‘Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!’ And he said to him, ‘Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive; he was lost, and is found.’”  Luke 15:25-30

“This son of yours”…..not “my brother”.  Three words come to my mind: Jealousy, envy and coveting.  These three things destroys families,

“Son, I am with you always and all I have is yours….”  Isn’t that enough for crying out loud!!!”  But for some children, and even friends, now matter how much we love them and give them, it’s never enough.  The most pleasant people to be around are those that are satisfied with what they have—the worst are those that are never satisfied and alway what others have.

Celebrating the “dead”, or lost brother—-was the right thing to do regardless of the older brother’s jealousy and  hate.

I have four brothers—three older and one younger. Big brothers can be mean.

As we said a last week, the parables of Jesus are easy to read, but are quite profound, nuanced and are intended to cause us to consider our lives and how we’re preparing for eternity. The parables give us the greatest insight, in my opinion, of any other lessons about the true nature of God and how He intends for us to live and act if we want become true kingdom citizens.

The focus today is not on the prodigal son, but rather the grumpy older son.  If you consider  all the complaints he made to his father, you’ll see that they were all valid and true.  That’s the problem with grumpy old people and grumpy young people—they are usually quite correct about what they gripe about.  But then, so are the joy-filled people. It’s all about what you are looking for.  What do you look for in people? The things that touches God’s heart or the things that irk you? Both are present, but our fixation or one or the other influences how we see them and treat them.

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Jesus wanted His listeners to consider the older brother.  Because most of the people listening to  Him were like the older brother—some of us in the this room are as well. The older brother was the one that never really did anything wrong that bad. He may have had ill thoughts and some  pretty evil dreams, but he was externally devout and faithful.   He was an actor of righteousness—but it was not in his heart.  He was jealous, perhaps, of all the little brother got away with!

In a real sense, the older brother is the “baby-brother” in the story—he behaves just like a spoiled brat. Things aren’t like he wants, so he decides to pout and ruin the happy time for everyone else.  He’s upset with his father’s love and mercy—as most grumpy people are. Angry people don’t like others being happy.   He was quite  happy to receive his dad’s mercy, from time to time,  but he resents this “sinner” of a brother coming home to so warm a welcome.  Something was wrong with his heart.  Something is wrong with any heart that is not able to get excited about the repentance, redemption and restoration of a child of God that wants to turn their back on a bad life and enter into a new life.

We can understand a little of why the older son felt like he did. As I said, I have four  brothers and five sisters, and I can recall wanting to be the favored one.  Perhaps the younger boy was the apple of his dad’s eye, or maybe younger son so was the lazy one at the farm, or perhaps the elder son just resented the waste and shame the boy brought upon the family name. And here is his indulging father once again putting up with that sorry little brother. Clearly, the elder son was not happy to see his brother return.  And that’s the point.  The older son would have been quite content for the younger boy to have starved to death, been put in prison or killed.  It was as if the younger brother were dead anyway, in the elder brother’s mind, and he was quite happy being the only child! The elder held no desire for his sibling to ever come home again.  That kind of heart, and that way of thinking does not belong in the kingdom of God—or in the church of Jesus Christ.

How do we feel about people that are lost, (but having a grand time in their sin), but then turning around and returning to God?  Are we resentful and envious of the bad that they did—or are we jealous that we didn’t get a chance to be a prodigal son for while also!  I never get the idea that the elder son had much love for his younger brother or his father.  It’s like he lived the life he had to live—-not the life he really wanted  to live.

Listen to what his attitude and response when his dad begs him to come to the party:  “… he was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and begged him, but he answered his father,

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‘Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!”

So you see, he felt betrayed, disrespected, unappreciated, and perhaps even unloved.  But he was dead wrong—and he knew it.  He makes it clear that this younger brother is not his brother—he refers to him as, this son of yours”.  How sad.  He didn’t call him a brother, but “this son of yours.”

Again, externally the older son was the “good boy”.  When the party began he had l just finished another hard day's work, made harder for all these years by his little brother's absence. He was not now, or formally,  in a forgiving mood, nor was he ready to accept—much less celebrate—his little brother's return to the family. To him, his brother was a loser and already dead and forgotten.

But he has no idea of what his younger brother had gone through, let alone how his brother had humbled himself and was quite ready to be a servant—-not a son or brother.  Neither do you or I know the steps the lost or back slidden have walked prior to coming to Jesus Christ!   In the elder son’s anger and self-pity, he lost sight of what was truly important. In addition, he failed to recognize the futility of trying to change or control what others do.  Little brother make horrible choices and duly suffered for it.  Sometimes, the people we have to let go of the ones we love, for a season, but we’re never told to let the love end.

The story of brothers being jealous and heartless goes back to the beginning of our time on this planet. You recall that Cain allowed his pride to fuel great resentment against his righteous brother, Abel. This pride transformed Cain into a miserable murderer.   Later Joseph’s jealous older brothers almost killed him, but instead sold him into slavery. The older son in this parable  was simply not a very happy young man. No one can despise a brother, like he did, or Cain did. and be lead a very  happy life. He had missed out on a life of joy before his brother left the home.

When you think about it, the members in our families don’t make us “unhappy”. To be unhappy is to allow a disposition to take hold of you—-and it causes you to retreat into our own little miserable kingdom of self-pity and resentment. Perhaps you’re unhappy today?  But who are you blaming?

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Of course Jesus was also pointing out the sin and hypocrisy of the of the Pharisees and scribes when He told this parable—-and they knew it.  Just like these Jewish religious leaders, the elder brother was living and judging by the letter of the law, not by its spirit. By all appearances, the elder brother was righteous, but inside, where a person's character forms, he was teeming with jealousy, hatred and hypocrisy.

The older brother represents the Pharisaical attitude that resents God's interest in sinners—the same attitude in the early church that initially looked suspiciously at the inclusion of Gentiles. The older son’s self-righteousness manifests itself in jealousy and envy. Elder sons are still here, of course.   And it’s sad that we put up with the “older brother attitude” in churches.  You’ve seen it. It’s the self-righteousness, those who shun others who do not live up to their standard of righteousness (Proverbs 20:6; Galatians 6:3; Titus 3:5).  But people that think like this forget that their righteousness is as filthy as the rags of the prodigal son (Isaiah 64:6).  Were it not for the blood of Jesus, we would have no righteousness.

Being born again is representative of what the younger son did. Living a “Spirit filled life”, is to respond to those that seek salvation like the father did—with affection and open arms. It’s not always easy or convenient to embrace people into Christian fellowship, whose previous life or values we once despised. In fact, it’s sometimes hard.   G.K. Chesterton famously said that, “Christianity has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult and seldom tried.”   Yes, it is hard to forgive those that hurt us and those that hurt the ones we love.  It’s near impossible to show kindness to those that wallow in sin and do things that sicken our stomachs..  But when they humble themselves and repent, it’s time to recall that we were once no better—perhaps far worse—than the ones that are asking to be restored.  God, our Father, expects us to receive back those that have sinned just as HE has received us back.

Once we become a Christian (which is easy), we learn that we are to be transformed—which does involve some pain! The elder brother had to let go of his resentments against his sibling because that resentment kept him outside the feast.

Jesus brilliantly leaves the end of the parable open.  You see, the elder brother has three options:

-He can keep his pride and decide to childishly pout and not go into the feast.  He will be alone and will miss all the fun, but his intent is to punish his father. Today, are you alone or are you enjoying the banquet of the Good Father?

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-He can go into the feast without forgiving his brother. He would have all that hate and fury trapped inside him, but perhaps he’s waiting for the chance to humiliate his younger son in front of the father and guests. Maybe he wants to make a big scene and ruin it all. What a pitiful life….

-Or he can come to his senses and rejoice as his father asked him, because his brother who was lost has been found and the family is united again.  In a word, love could take control.

The Pharisees were very religious and obeyed the laws, but they weren’t “loving” people.  You can live your whole life without letting a drop of liquor touch your lips, never take a single puff on a cigarette or vape, keep your mind totally free from lust and sexual fantasies, be at a church every time the paint a room or have a meeting, but if you have hate in your heart, you’re no different that this lost, older son.

Very early one morning I had a dream about a man I once worked for, a pastor of a large church. I was the youth pastor, and the man did not like me—and quite a few other people. He remains one of the most unkind people I have ever known.  I did not like him. He’s been dead for years now.  But last night, in my dream, I was working with him again, in that same church, and I was helping him sing the closing hymn. I recall that he was leading in one tempo, but a rather loud member of the choir was singing at a faster tempo, and he was frustrated. So I stepped forward and tried to sing louder, at the slower tempo the pastor was singing. He noticed, and was grateful.

But on the last verse of the song, he began to weep. The song reminded him of his granddaughter, who was dying. He was heart broken. And as he cried, I began to cry and my heart melted for him.  For the first time I had compassion on a man that never showed compassion to me or ever displayed any love for me. I thanked God for the dream and for the chance to have love and compassion for  a person, even though it was  in a dream, and even though he as long gone, and even though in life I had always rather resented him.

Friends, your father might be a deacon….or a pastor….or a  priest….or even a bishop.  But if you harbor hatred towards another brother or sister, your heavenly father is not God Almighty. I John 4:8 warns us, “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”